About the Poem

I wrote this poem after watching a powerful movie on Joan of Arc. It really made me think about what some people have done for their god and although I don't believe in God (at least I don't think I do) this movie made me wonder why people would do these outrageous things if there was no God.

Anyway, it sort of represents the two sides of me, the side that wants to believe, and the side that still can't.

I Cry Out In Vain

by Jesse Wintonyk

I question your God, my heart, and my soul
Existence needs proof, in stories I'm told
But I sit here and cry, lacking gratification
While others have died, solely for their religion

So why do I cry? If I do not believe
What makes me doubt, I can not conceive
Is it power above? Or in my own heart
where these feelings are born, I know not where to start

Is God just a form of societal ethic?
Or is God a true being, to be viewed as angelic
It is nature to question, but with no answers received
I am still hanging, what can I achieve?

In need of assistance, I cry out in vain
I am a lost child, my doubts will retain
But I fear for my death, for what will remain

please help . . . for I fear I am already slain.

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32 Visitor Comments

kimberly

my heart cries for you. jeremiah 29:12-14 "then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and i will listen to you. you will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. i will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity. " God wants soo much to just hold you in his arms. he is pursuing you because he LOVES you. dont hold back from his magnificently incomprehensive grace!

The W

To whom it may concern. Just the very thought of you asking the question is the beginning of OUR GOD introducing himself to you. I pray that GOD will show Himself strong in you life. That feeling you have on the inside is the Holy Spirit taking up residence within you.

matt

hey man, we all have to come to christ on our own. he made us with a free will. that is what is so great about is love. we are not FORCED to love and serve him. but eternal life is atainable only through acceping Jesus Christ as you personal savior. the wanting to believe is the call of jesus, but the doubting is of the enemy (satan). he wants you to love him, but ultimatly its your choice. i will keep you in my prayers. ps when you start reading the bible, start in the new testament. it really helps

babygirl

first off, i'll start by saying that your poem was very intersting. secondly, i want you to always, always, remember that GOD is your reason for living. think about it, he loved you so much that he gave his only begotten son to die on the cross for all of our sins. GOD is your reason for being, and you should thank him because without him there would be no you. Keep your head up, and remember, God loves you.

Glynis

I THINK IT'S A BEUATIFUL POEM AND THAT ALOT OF PEOPLE FEEL THE SAME WAY ESPECIALLY YOUNG ADULTS. IT'S NOT THAT THEY DON'T BELIEVE, IT'S JUST THAT THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY SHOULD BELIEVE IN OR IF THEY BELIEVE. I THINK THE POEM HELPS YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE NOT HTE ONLY ONE AND THAT IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE GOING TO HELL LIKE MANY OLD PEOPLE SAY JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND AND I THINK IT'S A BEAUTIFUL STEP IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION. IT'S BETTER TO BE HONEST AND THAN TO SAY YOU BELIEVE, YOU UNDERSTAN AND THEN YOU DON'T AND END UP DOING THE WRONG THINGS.

Josh

You know, I serve God whole heartily. And I tell one thing, God is a true living being, I might not see him bit I know He lives because what I feel is not fake. I am a native aboriginal. Before I got saved, I looked and studied my culture, customs, beliefs, and religion in Native Aboriginal people. I found nothing, that religion was dead, it never satisfied that void inside, and I question God's existence many times. God is real, Jesus will reveal himself to you Jesse if you allow Him to.

Tong

Hey girl, God has bless everyone with a wonderful gift, even though you cant see god you know what effect he does in peoples souls and spirits like the wind you cant see it but you can certainly know that its doing something. l know what tough state you are at the moment but just open your heart and ask yourself. have you every felt a hole in your spirit that you cant explain, lm sure all of us do and l found that place in my heart l never had and lm not going back to it where l was by myself hopeless and could do nothing. but you know that there are 2. 1 billion christian out there who know the truth and that he is alive and he gave the ultimate sacrifice so we could be set free from all bad things in the world. l hope this esater you will surely understand why jesus died. if you havnt then watch "passion of the Christ" l wish you well and god will bless you forever amen follow and "he will give you everlasting life and happiness" bye girl PS keep the god poems up

Joe

I was inspired by your poem because I have gone through all the doubts and questioning that you seem to feel. A search for truth takes a lot of courage. I finally found sureness that there is a God by looking at all the things that would not be possible with out God. Like love, forgiveness,higher visions, creativity and the intricate meshing universe.

patsy

This peom is deep and hits at the core of everone's life at some point and time.

Joy

Realizing you are lost is the first step toward finding God. Your poem was very deep and honest. God appreciates that, as do I. Knowing God, is all about having faith. It's not enough to believe God exists, but to have a personal relationship with His Son is the answer. Please get a GOOD bible and spend some time with Him in prayer. Ask him into your heart and WITH FAITH, BELIEVE! You will finally know for sure that He's very real and that He loves you very much! I PROMISE! God bless you! For by grace are ye saved THROUGH FAITH; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: EPHESIANS 2:8

Rosa

If god didn't exist then who created the heavens the earth the flowers even us think who lets you live and breath every day I believe in the lord JesusChrist because he gives so much even when Im so bad believe and he will be with you

chrissi

i think this is a good pome and keep writen and always rember god loves you. he died for your sins. maybe you need to get right with god and cry out and give it all to him. e mail me somtime or im me on aim. xoxgodislifexox4! God bless! Chrissi

That's a really great peom! God is putting it on your heart to believe and He wants to be your personal savior. Romans 3:23-24

Natasha

Hey! I just wanted to let you know that you have an amazing talent for poetry! I can understand the battle that you feel inside. But i promise you that there is a God and that He loves you more then you could ever imagine! The bible says that We will seek Him and find Him when we search for Him with all our heart. Jerimah 29:13. From the sound of your amazing poem, it sounds like that is exaclty what your doing! He's there with you and always has been and i beleive that if you ask Him to and continue to seek Him, He will show Himself to you and it will change your life more then you could ever imagine! He will fullfill you and give you more peace, joy, purpose, and love then you could ever have imagined! Keep going strong girl! And keep writing with that talent! Your a blessing to us all! Thanks! Tasha

Bri

This poem brought tears to my eyes. I just had to let you know how I felt. I am no christian, in fact I am a Unitarian Universalist. But my religion encourages me to search for my own answers, and this poem is exactly what I feel. Sometimes I think yes there must be a god, but other times with all the pain, there is much doubt. I have come to conclude that yes there is a god, but he is not a he but something we don't know and never will. we only see the effects of love and know something more powerfull exists. I just want you to know your not alone others feel the same way!

WHAT A WONDERFUL POEM, I WOULD JUST LIKE TO POINT YOU IN THE STARTING DIRECTION IN FINDING GOD, JESSE LOOK AT A PAINTING. ASK YOUR SELF WHO PAINTED THAT PAINTING? A PAINTER, RIGHT. LOOK AT A WATCH. WHO MADE THAT WATCH? A WATCH MAKER. LOOK OUTSIDE AT A TREE? WHO MADE THAT TREE? A CREATOR MADE IT. WHEN YOU HAVE A CREATION THERE ALWAYS HAS TO BE A CREATOR.

irismar

your poem is truthful,and good. because i once did not know who was GOD or if he was true or just some made up story/charater. but now i know he is as true as the air we breath,as true as love,as true as months go by. so true i can feel him pass by my chair,talk softly into my ear when i cry out and he tells me,YOU ARE NOT ALONE". if you dont believe pray 2 him and ask him for help and im sure he will anwser,mark my word. not sure when but GOD always comrs in the right timing. GOD BLESS YOU AND REMEMBER GOD LOVES YOU!

Ryan

Hey man, i just want to babble about your poem a bit. reading it brought back memories of my life. i had the same struggle with what to believe in. finally i moved to a new town and by chance became friends with some christains. soon i got into christain music although i only go to church sunday nights 'cause thats all i have time for. i suggest finding some christain music to listen to. after a while it helped me big time.

Patricia

i loved it it really touched my heart thanks a lot!

Louise

Full marks for this poem. Jesse your poem was deeply thought provoking. The honesty and realness of your emotion and willingness to share this with others is inspiring. Keep being real. Remember God is longing to be there for you, just let Him know that you need Him to.

Sarah

Wow, that was exactly what I needed right now, exactly what I'm feeling. Thank you, you have some real talent.

Erin

Hey Jesse, this poem is great. I want you to know that im a christian and believe in God. He is wonderful that is for sure. He changes peoples lives. Dont give up. Just pray to him amd except him into your heart. Dont give up. You are a great writer. Its one of your great talents God has given you! :) GOD LOVES YOU!

Nick

i really enjoyed reading your poem. it described how many people feel right before they accept that their is a God. Thank you for the wonderful work and i really hope you find the Lord our God. ~God Bless~

Rebeca

God loves you because he made you. He's real. I know you have emptiness in you that no matter what everyone tells you it's not going to go away. See he's the only one that could take all those doubts and that emptiness away. The only thing you have to do is open your heart to him accept him and he'll do the job. God is a gentle man he only comes in if you open the door. So that's my advice for you. God is waiting to come to him.

Cinda

Dear Jesse, Beautiful poem. I think you have answered your own question though. Who do you think your soul is crying out to? It cries out to God who created it. A lot of people have mistakenly said faith is blind. Love is blind, but faith in God of surpassing intelligence, creativity, power and love, should not be blind, it should be sought after and understood. God told Israel that those who seek Him would find Him, but only if they seek with their whole heart. Jesus told the religious leader that although no one could see the wind, everyone knew it exsisted because there was enough evidence. Paul, a well known follower of Jesus, an apostle and a very educated man, wrote that we should study God to be approved of Him. We can't see the wind and we can't see God, but there is enough evidence, if we look honestly for it and at it, to see that both exist.

Bill

This was an amazing poem. I went to my church crying out, asking where he was in my life. asking what he's punishing me for. I realize that there will always be happy and sad moments in my life. without sadness how would there be happiness? he is with us, he fufill's us. i don't know what i would do without my belief in him. what would be a reason for living? he is an amazing being and without him i would be lost. i love your poem. it was touching and it was very deep. keep writing!

Brenda

Jesse Wintonyk Your poem inspired me to wonder more about what God is all about. You are a very good poet and should continue to write more.

katie

i grew up in this blief of God. i was raised to believe that he existed, and over time it just became second nature. i stopped believing the truth and the realness of who God is and just said what ever made everyone else happy. i got angry with God not knowing why things were going wrong, why my life was so screwed up why everything was turning upside down. I was suppose to be his child, why was he treating me this way. thats when i realized that there is so much more to God than i realized. he wants a relationship with me. he wants me to tell him my problems even though he already knows. he longs to be there for me. he wants me to be his girl. he cares about me like a daughter a lover a friend. trust me if you keep searching and don't give up you will find a love that you have never known from any person. i promise you that

Jesse

Oh, god, this poem is so wonderful. Please believe in god, though, because look at all that talent he's blessed you with. I believe in god, and he makes me happy. Please believe friend, for you will become happier if you do.

Rogue

I understand why it's hard for you to imagine a God but he's there. I've seen him in dreams, talked to him through my mind, and experienced his miracles. He's great and loving and even though taking his path seems little harder with all the surrounding temptations it's well worth it all. Sorry, I must be babbling. The poem was wonderful, it's seen you're truly blessed.

Helga

Your heart's cry is real,and God loves you so much that He has made provision for your peace in Jesus

Tess

What talent God of the Universe has given you! The way you portray the battle inside of you is amazing.keep searching ans questioning Him and I am CONFIDENT that He will revael Himself to you if you want to know the truth with your whole heart :)

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