About the Poem

This poem is about a person with compassion for others. You will not feel offended by this and I promise that this will make you laugh.

My First Time

by Alex

The sky was dark
The moon was high
All alone
Just her and I
Her hair so soft
Her eyes so blue
I knew just what
She wanted to do
Her skin so soft
Her legs so fine
I ran my fingers
Down her spine
I didn't know how
But I tried my best
To place my hand
On her breasts
I remember my fear
My fast beating heart
But slowly she spread

Her legs apart
And when she did it
I felt no shame
All at once
The white stuff came
At last it's finished
It's all over now
My first time
Milking a COW!

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116 Visitor Comments

Whitney

That was a good good poem. I thougt it was a real person but I guess you say it was a cow.

cinthia

this was soo funny it totally mislead me i was actually freaking out what it would be cause my bro was in here lol

Karina

it really funny i liked it a lot

diego jr

jajaj this poem is really cool jajajj cuz in the way its start off and the way it finish

Guy

Man, a friend of mine took this to school and used it in a poetry project. When it was his turn to read his poem that he got, he started reading this, and it was hilarious! The teacher tried to stop him like 8 times, but he finished it and she got a huge kick out of it.

kari

This poem was SOOOOOOO DARN FUNNY ! I told my grandma and she was about to come in the room and start yelling at me , my then i finished it and it got a big kick out of it ! Then a ( friend ) came down and we were talking about it, and i brought it up and i read it out loud and he got a kick out of it too ! NICE JOB ! **** you sould make more like that ****

Bob

I first heard this poem about 40 years ago and have been trying to remember it for about the past year. I couldn't get past "I knew exactly what she wanted to do". Glad I found it. As funny now as it was 40 years ago.

Cindy

I loved this poem and have friends whom I know would get a big smile from it

CONUSELO

THIS IS A VERY FUNNY POEM FORM START TO END!

jocelyn

ITS CUTE AND FUN AND JUST SIMPLE LAUGH TO MAKE THE REST OF YOUR DAY!

Craig

It made me want to milk the cow

Nicole

I love it, I read it to my class and the love it too.

chantelle

this poem was very funny and unique. i thought this poem was created very well. with alot of imagination.

David

Excellent! It's great to know that poetry like this is still being written. Easy to read, clever and very funny. Keep up the good work!

gina

lol. omg, i almost peed my pants, no joke!

JACKIE

I THOUGHT THIS POEM WAS REALLY FUNNY AND I THINK YOU SHOULD KEEP DOING YOUR THING

Mellnda

I hope you don't always thi k like this when you have sex.

cate

this was so funny at first i thught it was going to be about something totally different but the last two lines change everything haha i loved it

Elizabeth

Just wanted to say the poem was awesome. I was lmao. Thanks for the laugh.

Garen

This is the best poem ever

hevy J jr.

it was so funny. i had a bunch of my friends read it and they laughed sooooooo hard. the bad thing was i had 2 pee really bad and i almost peed my pants. great poem keep it up make some more.

Jon

lol thats a pretty funny poem in the begiing its iskc but wen u get to the end its HILARIOUS

meghan

AWESOME!

Kellie

OMG this poem was so funny i laughed my head off i took it to school and showed my algebra teacher and laughed so hard she fell out of her chair!

Chennel

That poem touched me!

Bob

I loved this poem. Misleads the reader right down to the final line. I would like to read more from him!

Emma

i fink dis poem is really funny coz it makes u think diffrent to the meanin lol

Terri

I really loved this poem. I read it thinking I would be reading something totally different than what it was. I laughed for an hour.

Drake

This Poem Kicked it's really funny word ^ to the person who wrote this

j0na

its so weird! at first, i thought u were perverted, but it was pretty funny! P. S, arent they called udders?

catherine

that was funny i like it good job !

Heidi

I thought it was a really good poem. I was not expecting that for an ending very much injoyed reading it.

Tyrone

I rate this poem a five star. for both being funny and leaving suspense. this young man has talent and should have a career at this kind of stuff. Thank you, Tyrone

mario

funny poem. makes you think of somethin else and surprises you at the end.

jazmin

I REALLY LIKED YOUR POEM YOU HAD ME THINKING WRONG. ITS A PRETTY GOOD ONE.

Monica

This poem ROCKS!

Erika

WOW! that was great! very hilarious! i cant stop laughing!

matthew

Cheeky I love it

mackenzie

that poem made my day, like really it was hilarious.

laura

Have you repeated the experience?? I'd like you to show me how you did it. it seems so wonderful! ; )

meli

OMG, u had my step dad fooled. He told me i was on the wrong site until i got to the end, hahahahahaha. I wonder what he thought bout the end, HAHAHAHAHA!

dude

dude got me excited for a sec. even though it didnt end like i wanted it to, it still was a cool poem so i give you some props. keep it up dude.

Daniel

I thought it was a real girl it was funny that I had to show my parents . They didn't like it as much. But i did keep up the gd wk Alex

heather

Funny, funny, funny! It took me by suprise.

lewis

awesome i absolutely love it. I work at a dairy so it struck me extremely funny in fact i took it to work and showed my bosses and they got a big kick out of it. thanks alot for the amusement and keep up the goood work.

chelsea

hahaha great poem! it made me laff so much

Christina

dis was really funi. i loved it 4 out of 5 ****

nicky

This poem was the bomb. Am still laughing. u really had me there for a while.

Didier

really funny . hehehe =)

danielle

its funny

Rob

i loved this poem it is my faveret one. and all of my frends love it too!=D 8D ^_^

Kokuryu

i was like. ewwww*shiver* why in the world is this in here!?!?!?! in the end i was laughing so hard. i farted. JUST KIDDING! but yes im still laughing. lol

Hold

THIS POEM WAS HILARIOUS!

Niqua

This is throwed! I thought it was gettin nasty at first. Kinda fooled me, but it ended good!

Shiloe

This was the most funniest poems I have ever read.

Belen

It was a good one make more of this kind of poems.

Charlene

haha! you had me a little confused in the begining and wondering why this was in the funny section untill i got to the end. it was a great poem. very funny had me laughing for 5 minutes

someone

great poem alex

Rossana

I like your poem

Elizabeth

I really think the poem is fuuny!

shelly

that was sooooooo cute! u had me goin 4 a min. though

andrea

great job this is the best poem i have ever read

Shantrell

This is very lol funny. You had me going for a minute. Great job!

bobby

I though you were talking about sex

Brandon

Great poem I thought that you was talking about something else and you know what I mean.

Josh

I love this poem it makes you think that a boy and a girl are getting ready to do it.

sassie

so funny,horny,mad. loved it!

tina

very very funny poem. hilarious. o gosh my eyes r balling out.

cindy

this is a great poem!

cris

this poem's funny i laughed

Cryst

I love this poem!

Shane

WOW this poem made me laugh so hard.keep it up!

Mandy

so funny! i loved it

Lori

I love this poem.My friends in school like this poem

Drewbear

That was by from the most funniest thing I have ever read. The ending got me off guard , I reminded me of something ( ah good-times good-times)

ah-xiao

funni

Jennifer

This was one of the funniest poems I ever read I loved it great job

Marcus

I wasn't expecting the ironic ending it gut busting.What can I say? It was funny!

Andrea

Great Poem! its truly funny,it had me and my friends laughing we even sent it to friends so they'll laugh! keep up the good work!

Boo

Udderly delicious. Makes me want to drink some warm milk. Night night!

Ali

Alex, Great Poem, i sent it to all my friends and realatives. YOU GO ALEX! SEE YA BABE

Kates

Funny poem! Good job, I encourage you to keep writing.

Dayne

One word---Stupendous!

Master16

GREAT

jessica

this poem is so funny cause i thought that the cow was his girlfriend or something!

William

It was freaking hilarious.

lexi

oh my gosh! that was soooooo funny! u had me goin for a while i loved it and sent it to all my friends!

Kara

You're a funny guy!!! Nice Poem. But i could beat you any day!

carla

i thought you where talking about sex. but it was great.Ilove it.

Jahaira

This poem is the best, it made me laugh hysterically. I read it to me sister, at first she was shocked but also she started laughing. Keep up the good work!! Congratulations!!!!!!!!

Catalinna

I've been e-mailed this poem so many times before and it makes me laugh every time!

Courtney

Fabulous, just fabulous!!! lol

Natasha

Brilliant! Simply Brilliant!

ryan

i gotta send this to my girlfriend. haha... good stuff!

Kiara

That was the funniest poem I have ever heard!

Joy

very amnusing

lauren

this poem is great i thought it was going to be really rude and crude but no it made me laugh and its cheered me up. and i definitly want u 2 win, its brill! i'm only 12 and i enjoyed it!!!! good luk

nina

i love it! great

Deanna

Great poem! Very misleading at the beginning.

nick

good funny

DONNA

I REALLY ENJOYED YHIS POEM OF YOURS .I HAVE SENT IT TO ALL OF MY FRIENDS.

Teri

I loved the way the whole poem set you up..leading you down the path of what you believed to be the ultimate goal..and then ..wham..the killer ending..it totally rocks...I love this poem..great job..kudos to author

Razor

Alex - you the man! Great poem, hope my teacher likes it…

Sarah

Absolutely Hysterical!! I read it to my mother, and it was hard to keep a level voice, let alone a straight voice!

Tressa

This poem is so funny! you are a very good writer!

Alex

kicks

caroline

This poem was great a very good laugh. It should get many stars.

barb

my husband & I laughed at this one. you did a great job. keep up the good work.

James

I was fooled at first. I thought that this poem was sick until I read the ending.

janis

Unexpected - very funny!

Normy

Its soo funny! great job! you got me there! i shared it with all my friends.. what a laugh!

Melissa

I can't stop laughing....it caught me completely by surprise.....Alex you did a great job with this poem and subject.....ROFL....

debi

soooooofunny, i had to email it to all my co-workers at home

Clarissa

that has to be the funniest poem i've ever read. i can't wait to read more of your work.

Sean

this poem is really funny!

wik-ed! many respec 2 dis poem! i, dis poem is not writtern by any old batty boy, .. but i guess it didn't turn me on though! keep up da progress , want more of the poems like dat on the net

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